Wednesday, August 31, 2011

How I Spent My Summer Vacation - Day #1

It’s day #1 of a long needed vacation from work and days two through eight will be spent at home but thankfully so. Now on to the exciting tale of my first day. Most of you know of the every other week treks I make to North Carolina to check on and do for my stepfather. It’s about a six hour round trip drive (not counting the times when he has doctors appointments which are at least 45 minutes away from his home). In any event, I left this morning at the crack o’ dawn so I could get to the other side of Atlanta before the rush hour really began. As I drove into the driveway and saw that the shade on the door was still down and the door locked, I began to worry a tad. He’s usually always up before 9am. Luckily the sliding glass door was partially open (there is a cat door in the sliding screen door for Miss Kitty who is a whole other story) so I was able to get in. I quietly tiptoed to his bedroom door watching the sheets to be sure he was still breathing (thank you God!)…he is 87 after all. While he slept I gathered up the bills, bank statement, and checkbook and had them almost done when he awoke. On to the pillbox and refills while he drank his coffee. Oh wait – I promised exciting didn’t I?

Frank’s little house is very compact – a tiny kitchen/dining/living room, two small bedrooms, and a bathroom. One of the bedrooms is used for storage – it used to be where my mother kept all of her yarns and threads – she was a weaver. In any event, while I was at the kitchen table I kept getting this faint whiff of something not too pleasant. When I went into the spare room there was a horrible over-whelming smell and I thought Miss Kitty had either deposited a gift or brought in a gift (which she does on an almost daily basis). Ole Frank said “Oh yes, I’ve been smelling that but didn’t see anything.”

OK, hold your breath (I certainly was by that time or at least breathing through my mouth) here comes the exciting part. On the wall shelves where extra canned goods, etc. were stored….well…..have you ever smelled or seen a bag of potatoes that was mostly juice? I thought I was going to pass out from the smell! Finally got that sucker into a big garbage bag – not very gracefully either…then had to scrub the wall and floor where they had dripped, clean off cans where they had run, WASH bottles of BOOST that had been dripped upon.

Oh no, we aren’t to the exciting part yet….really! These shelves are the rubber coated wire type and Frank had put a very thin piece of some type of wood over the top one – I guess so things wouldn’t fall through. Well I knew that lovely potato juice would have soaked it through and it needed to go. So off that shelf came everything (along with a bag of flour that, shall we say, was beginning to look like it was inside out. Not sure what was happening with that but it went in the garbage bag with the potatoes) and I lifted up that thin piece of wood – are you ready? Really ready? For the exciting part?

Can you say maggots? Ewwwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwwwww! I’m telling you I nearly died, very vocally, as I ran through that tiny house to get that thing out of the house and onto the garbage pile. And then I had to clean the ones that were on the wire shelf off – ewwwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwww ewwwwwwwwwww. I don't DO maggots - I don't even want to LOOK AT maggots!  Anything not in a can is banned from that room!

Now tell me – could I have had a more perfect vacation day? Bwahahahahahahahahaha!


  1. Oh yuck! Did you check those canned goods? If his other stuff was that old, his canned goods probably are too. OMG! I'm with you, girlfriend, I'd run screaming from that house when I saw those dang maggots too. I was sitting here doing the heebie-jeebies just reading your post.

    And hey, glad you found your stepfather alive. I was scared you were going to tell me he had fallen and died.

  2. Your post is 'horribly' funny. I'm sitting here shivering at the very thought, you know the feeling when you knees turn to jelly.. At the same time I'm laughing...Sorry. But you do tell a great story....

    I hope that you have recovered and that your stepfather doesn't forget the potatoes again...

    I'm dropping by to say a 'BIG THANK YOU' for my gift, it arrived this morning and I love it. In fact I'm thrilled to bits. Thank you once again.

    Enjoy your day and don't think too much about anything that wiggles ~ Julie.x

  3. All I can say Jillybean, is better YOU than me. My imagination was running wild, thinking of a deceased Ms. Kitty and do dead cats smell like rotten potatoes and never once did my vivid thoughts venture to maggots. Gross me out! Yep. Welcome to September. I loves you muchly!

  4. hey have you seen the tv show Hoarders? euwwwwwwwweee after watching that maggots are nothing lol....but my hats off to you...poor Frank, give him a hug from me x Samm

  5. Good grief and I thought I had a bad day with renters. hahahahaha
    Nothing worse than finding a bag of potaotes left like this but OMG not the M word. I think I am feeling a little sick to my stomach just thinking of what you had to do.
    I am sending you lots of wishes for a better vacation day.

  6. Stars in your crown, Jill; stars in your crown! Yes, anytime someone 87 is breathing...that IS exciting. Heck, I get excited when I remember to take deep breaths -grin-.


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